I feel like the gum under a shoe.
And I feel like I deserve it.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Friday, October 2, 2009
Monthly Post
Oh dear oh dear, where to start?
I should really try to update more than once a month, but activities pile up and I dread reliving them all through blogging. *grimace* However, I'm so busy that I find I need to organize my thoughts and clear out the junk in my head.
Let's start with school. We have a concert in four days (October 6th). I actually think we're ready for it. Concert Choir - my youngest and most inexperienced choir - will muddle through their first performance with an A for enthusiasm if not for accuracy. I really love my concert choir, they are willing to do most anything and are learning quickly. There are a few in there that make me wonder why they decided to do choir to begin with, but for the most part they are coming along fine.
My women's choir goes as usual. They alternately delight and disgust me. Teenage girls....twenty-five of them in the same room for an hour and a half. That is the disgusting part. However, when you can get them to focus for a few minutes, they sound fantastic. It takes an entire cheerleading squad and bribery to get them to do anything, but sometimes it's worth the effort when they produce the sound they're capable of. I wish I could get them to do it without performing a circus act for them everyday, but I guess that's the nature of the beast.
My oldest and supposed "advanced" choir...makes me want to shoot things. Or make things explode. Or crush things with giant hammers. Or tear my eyelashes out one by one.
Okay, so I'm frustrated...it's not always bad, but I happen to be updating this blog after a very frustrating week. I shall stop here, as I would rather not re-hash the very things I've been brooding. I took a 40 minute walk and instead of listening to my iPod I ran through various scenarios in my head as to what I would do to fix things so I wouldn't have to commit myself. I think I'm too much of a chicken to pull it off. I like these kids outside of class so it's hard for me to give them a reason to dislike me...even if I am fully justified in my complaints.
I know it sounds sad and lonely, but these students are the closest people to me down here. It's not that I need more friends, or that I'm lonely when I go home. I love the alone time I have because of how many people I'm around all day. But when you see the same people day in and day out, for over three years, you get close to them. I'm having a much easier time disciplining my newest students because I've finally gotten the hang of keeping the proper distance. But since I started out wrong with some of these older students, I don't really think there's any way to fix it. Not if I want to keep the relationships I have with them now.
It's a conundrum. ...
co·nun·drum
I should really try to update more than once a month, but activities pile up and I dread reliving them all through blogging. *grimace* However, I'm so busy that I find I need to organize my thoughts and clear out the junk in my head.
Let's start with school. We have a concert in four days (October 6th). I actually think we're ready for it. Concert Choir - my youngest and most inexperienced choir - will muddle through their first performance with an A for enthusiasm if not for accuracy. I really love my concert choir, they are willing to do most anything and are learning quickly. There are a few in there that make me wonder why they decided to do choir to begin with, but for the most part they are coming along fine.
My women's choir goes as usual. They alternately delight and disgust me. Teenage girls....twenty-five of them in the same room for an hour and a half. That is the disgusting part. However, when you can get them to focus for a few minutes, they sound fantastic. It takes an entire cheerleading squad and bribery to get them to do anything, but sometimes it's worth the effort when they produce the sound they're capable of. I wish I could get them to do it without performing a circus act for them everyday, but I guess that's the nature of the beast.
My oldest and supposed "advanced" choir...makes me want to shoot things. Or make things explode. Or crush things with giant hammers. Or tear my eyelashes out one by one.
Okay, so I'm frustrated...it's not always bad, but I happen to be updating this blog after a very frustrating week. I shall stop here, as I would rather not re-hash the very things I've been brooding. I took a 40 minute walk and instead of listening to my iPod I ran through various scenarios in my head as to what I would do to fix things so I wouldn't have to commit myself. I think I'm too much of a chicken to pull it off. I like these kids outside of class so it's hard for me to give them a reason to dislike me...even if I am fully justified in my complaints.
I know it sounds sad and lonely, but these students are the closest people to me down here. It's not that I need more friends, or that I'm lonely when I go home. I love the alone time I have because of how many people I'm around all day. But when you see the same people day in and day out, for over three years, you get close to them. I'm having a much easier time disciplining my newest students because I've finally gotten the hang of keeping the proper distance. But since I started out wrong with some of these older students, I don't really think there's any way to fix it. Not if I want to keep the relationships I have with them now.
It's a conundrum. ...
co·nun·drum
Pronunciation: \kə-ˈnən-drəm\
Function: noun
Etymology: origin unknown
Date: 1645
1 : a riddle whose answer is or involves a pun
2 a : a question or problem having only a conjectural answer b : an intricate and difficult problem
Right, I'm also working on White Christmas. Which is out for public use (if you buy the rights) as of this year. The music is INSANE. But I'll leave that for another post.
It is time to go eat my Marie Callendars Meatloaf. Yum.
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